Tuesday 14 February 2012

The Valentine's Day Tiger

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TigerAs gorgeous as they are, tigers are usually solitary in nature, interacting briefly only for mating purposes. So, don't be a Valentine's Day tiger!

The body is a great way to show love - but it's not the only way, in fact it's just one of a million ways to show our love to the blessings in our lives.

Below I share some of my ideas on the day, and how to celebrate it, especially if you're single.

Love is not just for Valentine's Day

Mickie Kent on Valentines Day

Valentine's Day at Mickie Kent
Celebrate the Love
Love For More Than One Day
Find Yourself Before Finding Love
You Have a Right to Real Love
How To Be a Healthy Valentine

February is touted as the month of love but the real power is in giving and receiving love 365 days a year; not just for one month or one day. I believe in celebrating love every day, and the 14th should be treated as a reminder to reflect on that daily celebration.

The day belongs to everyone, we're all worthy of love. The only way to make love grow is to be generous in sharing its spirit with all the important people in our lives. It's a day when we can express our deep love for our friends, our neighbours, our parents, our siblings, our children and our pets. And not forgetting ourselves.

Valentine's Day should not been seen as a day solely if you're in a romantic relationship with someone special, and its contemporary celebration has come under some criticism that it is too commercialised and marginalises single people. And sadly, Valentine's Day can leave many singles feeling lonely. We've all been fed the hype; I know this from personal experience, and I know people that are currently single and not exactly looking forward to the holiday this year.

Even though loneliness is just a state of soul and mind, everyone is prone to feeling lonely when it seems like everybody around you is happily partnered with someone special.

What can I do if I'm single?

So, if you're afraid of feeling sad this Valentine's Day, here are some tips and ideas on how to dodge the claws of the Valentine's Day Tiger and have a great time while single.

Activity ideas:

  1. Have a good time with your single friends, or with your family. Chances are, many of the people you know will feel the same way as you and need some company. Do something fun together, and you'll forget about what day it is. Better still if you can, throw a large party for your family (or single friends), bring all your loved ones together to share in the day and give thanks for the love already in your life.

  2. Travel. If there are a lot of memories where you are that you'd rather forget, it will help to change surroundings, if at all possible. It doesn't have to be far. Go on a cultural tour, or visit some place you've always wanted to see.

  3. Pamper yourself. Focus on yourself. Show yourself some love. Remember that you know best how to take care of yourself, and you don't need anyone else for that. Take a nice, long bath, get a professional massage or maybe go out shopping, and buy stuff you normally wouldn't. More importantly, decide to be happy with what you have.

  4. Preoccupy yourself with a hobby or interest. This isn't to say you should preoccupy yourself to forget about love, however. Try and immerse yourself in hobbies you feel passionate about, and add a love slant to them. Buy a book on a topic that fascinates you. Or read about love. Get down with some erotica. Do something creative. The greatest of artists have drawn inspiration from their personal pain. By actively engaging in something creative, you will not only find an activity to stop your mind from wandering on negative emotions, but you'll be letting the emotions out as well.

  5. Do something to not be single. If you truly loathe being single, spend some time making a plan for yourself on how you can meet more people and find yourself someone new again. Write down some ideas, and choose some to put on your to-do list. Take action to not feel lonely - because being single doesn't mean you have to be lonely. It's the perfect time to talk to someone new, or maybe seek out someone you used to be close with. Remember, there are plenty of others who may feel the same way as you do on Valentine's Day. Having a proactive attitude will stop self-pity from taking over.

General tips:

  1. Focus on other aspects of your life. Remember that finding love is an important part of life, but being happy means having the right mind set. Finding our twin flame is an essential part of our lifetime's time line, but there is more to living than having a boyfriend/girlfriend just because we feel lonely. We'll find the love we desire if we fall in love when you're ready, not when you're lonely.

  2. Focus on the positive. See inspiration, not something to envy in all those happy couples you see. Remember, happy couples and twin flames are living proof that love is out there for you and everyone to find be grateful for that.

  3. Show others you care. Show your gratefulness to the people you appreciate in your life. Cheering other people up and helping them will have a positive effect on you as well.

  4. Express yourself. Share your feelings about the day with someone understanding. Talk to someone who you know can relate. Or write it all down. From my personal experience, writing down your feelings into a little rant will make you feel better - even if it's just for your own eyes to see. The act of writing, enunciation, and of exploring who you really are is a transforming journey. The power is in the telling, and writing tells it in a way like no other.

  5. Do SOMETHING. Being idle is not a good choice when you're feeling blue. While your first instinct may be to stay in all night and watch sad movies (or maybe cheery comedies, either way), I'd suggest against that. Eventually, you'll get bored of staring at the screen, and the negativity can creep back in.

  6. Face your feelings. Being positive doesn't mean burying your true feelings. Don't pretend to feel all cheery and okay if you aren't. Indeed, you may think it's just a silly holiday, but that doesn't mean it's silly to wish for positive acknowledgement from others during holidays, silly holiday or not. It's understandable to not feel 100% cheerful, to feel a bit sad. Once you recognise that, it's time to take a positive look at your life.

    However, don't think you SHOULD feel down, either. Whether someone is single or in a relationship doesn't change anything about them and thus shouldn't affect their self-esteem. Don't let others bring you down, either - if you're feeling cheerful, and your single friends are feeling down, don't let the negativity affect you. Focus on getting them to feel better as well! Don't let anyone pity you or assume you're sad because you're single on Valentine's Day.

Don't forget that Valentine's Day is for you, too - so show yourself some love, particularly if you're single and usually feel low this day, to harness its healing power and attract more love into your life.

Yours in love,

Mickie Kent

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